The Same Cherry Blossoms
by ButInEssenceDivided
Summary: Ty Lee and Mai visit Azula's hospital. It was Azula who fell apart, but her friends are falling apart without her. some elements of The Promise, but not many because I like to pretend The Promise doesn't exist


It had been a long time since Mai had seen Ty Lee without her Kyoshi Warrior face paint. Gone were the sweeping black circles and the deadly fans. Ty Lee looked like the girl she had once been. The girl who giggled and turned cartwheels and ran away to join the circus. The cherry blossoms of the royal gardens had not changed. Listening to the rustle of the branches, Mai could almost hear the laughter of their past selves as they jumped from cobblestone to cobblestone, holding hands.

There was an initial stiffness to their meeting. Ty Lee had bowed deeply, and waved away the fully uniformed Kyoshi warriors who had accompanied her. Mai had bowed back, and insisted that the guard Zuko assigned to her left them alone. Formalities were never a match for Ty Lee, though, and the two girls were soon wrapped in each other's arms.

"I've missed you so much," Ty Lee said. "I never thought I'd say this, but being around happy, colorful people all the time is exhausting!"

"I've been saying that for years," said Mai. "I missed you too, Ty Lee."

The Kyoshi Warriors had been traveling with the Avatar around the world in the months since Zuko's coronation. Ty Lee seemed stronger, more self-assured. She still cooed over the turtle ducklings in the garden pond, but a seriousness had settled in her wide eyes. Quiet fell, and the only sounds were the taps of Ty Lee's heavy black boots and the whispers of Mai's silk slippers.

"So how is your aura?" Mai asked finally.

Ty Lee smiled. "Never pinker!" she said. "It's hard work we're doing. Seeing what the Fire Nation did to the world is terrible. I can't believe we fought on the wrong side for so long. But being a Kyoshi Warrior makes me feel like I belong to something that means more than all of my mistakes. I'm finally a part of something honorable and good."

Mai exhaled, blowing her bangs up off her forehead. "You sound like Zuko," she said, rolling her eyes. "But that's wonderful. I'm really happy that you're happy."

"That means a lot, coming from you! So what have you been doing? Should I be calling you Princess Mai yet?"

"As if! It's been busy here too. The Fire Nation is even more of a mess than it used to be. Everything has to start from scratch."

"The rebellions?"

Mai nodded sadly. "The ruling class under Ozai lost everything. People - people like our fathers. They still see Zuko as a traitor. They hate the Avatar, and they're doing everything they can to stop the Harmony Restoration Project."

"That's why Aang asked us to come here."

"I knew you didn't come here just to see me!"

"Of course I came to see you, silly! But -" Ty Lee bit her lip and looked down. She was terrible at keeping secrets, and she was an even worse liar.

"What is it?"

"I wanted to talk to you about something. About someone."

"Spit it out, Ty Lee," Mai said.

"I want to visit Azula."

Mai took a step backwards. "You can't be serious."

"She's our friend, Mai. She needs us."

"She might have been our friend once. I don't know whether even you could call what she was a friend. I'm not about to go visiting her."

"She's sick. She made some terrible mistakes but she is sick and lost and she needs us more than ever."

"Some terrible mistakes? She tried to kill her own brother, not to mention who knows how many other people! I won't go. Not after what she did to Zuko. She's a monster, Ty Lee."

"Even Zuko went to visit her, though!" Ty Lee protested.

"How on earth did you know that?"

"Oh the Kyoshi Warriors know everything," Ty Lee smirked, but her face fell again.

"Well don't you know that when she saw Zuko, she almost killed the guards around her? Zuko told me that since then she's been under even tighter security. Probably bound and gagged. She's lucky Zuko and the Avatar didn't send her to the Boiling Rock."

"Mai don't say that!" Ty Lee's eyes were swimming. "You care about her. And I know she cares about you."

"I'm not going," Mai scowled.

"Well I am!"

"Don't blame me if she attacks you with lightning," Mai said, but she regretted it a moment later, when Ty Lee turned on her heel and stalked out of the courtyard, flanked by Kyoshi Warriors.

The mob was at the palace gates and Zuko would not move away from the window. Every time someone caught a glimpse of him, more angry shouting erupted.

Mai touched his hand gently, then tugged him away. "Don't do that to yourself," she said.

"They're my people. I'm failing them." He hung his head so low it was as if the protestors had succeeded in snapping his neck.

Knowing perfectly well that easy comfort only made Zuko angrier, Mai wordlessly pulled him towards her. She smoothed back a strand of hair that had slipped out of the knot at the back of his head and looked into his eyes. Even the heavily scarred one drooped with exhaustion.

She reached upwards and wrapped her arms around his neck. Pressing her lips to his, she tasted familiar smoke.

"You need to rest," she said, finally turning away.

"Stay with me tonight," he said. "Don't leave me alone. Please?"

"Of course."

She untied his red silk robe and there was the charred, lightning-ravaged skin on his chest. She traced the outline softly, thinking of Ty Lee's request. Zuko pulled her onto the bed. He locked her to him, and though the night was balmy, he was shaking. There were nights like this, when Zuko clutched her so tightly that she couldn't breathe or move. He didn't sleep and if he managed to slip off, he would wake up constantly, terrified that they were about to be attacked.

"Zuko," Mai said, pulling herself free. She pulled her own robe around her and wrapped her arms around her knees, leaning against the headboard of the bed. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter!" he snapped.

Mai clenched her jaw but quickly regained her composure. "Stop it. If you aren't going to talk to me, I'm not going to stay."

"I'm as bad as my father."

Mai breathed huffily out of her nose. "If you're going to go to pieces every time someone compares you to your father, this Fire Lord thing is not going to go well."

"I'm not going to pieces. You don't know what it's like."

"Then tell me what it's like." Mai crossed her arms over her chest.

"The opposition is everywhere. Today I went to visit the school. We're trying to send some Earth Kingdom refugee kids there. There was a crowd of parents protesting."

"Protesting the new students?"

Zuko nodded. "I don't think it will be safe to send the Earth Kingdom kids there any time soon. When the mob saw me, they said I was abandoning the Fire Nation. That Azula should have been the Fire Lord."

"If Azula were Fire Lord there might not be a Fire Nation any more," said Mai.

"This old woman looked me in the eye and said that I was no better than my father. She said I betrayed Azula the same way Ozai betrayed my mother and me."

"You didn't betray Azula. She tried to kill you!"

Zuko looked down at the scar on his chest. "I know. But that's the thing about my sister. I had her locked away and I still can't escape from her. Do you ever think about her? Do you ever miss her?"

About to say "of course not!", Mai's voice caught in her throat. She thought of the teasing and the tricks Azula had played on her when they were young. The merciless way she had treated girls at school. Her war crimes. What she had done to Zuko. Then she thought of the friend who would always defend her. The little girl who burnt the pigtails off a school bully who called Ty Lee stupid. Azula who had made her laugh and rescued from the boredom and loneliness of her perfect, well-behaved life. Azula who was broken.

Before she could admit how much she missed Azula, Mai pictured Zuko doubled over, wracked by the pain that had lasted for months.

She peered at Zuko. "Do you?"

Zuko turned his face to the wall. "Once, at the Western Air Temple, I was sure Azula was going to fall to her death. She was trying to capture Aang, and she'd just let me fall. But my impulse was to steer the Avatar's sky bison straight to her. My instinct was to protect her, like when we were kids. I guess what I'm saying is - yes. I miss her."

"Ty Lee visited me today and she was talking about Azula too. She wants me to go with her to visit the hospital."

"Are you going to go?"

"I told Ty Lee I could never forgive Azula for what she did to you."

Zuko leaned over and kissed Mai on the forehead.

"But I might go so Ty Lee doesn't have to face her alone."

Zuko frowned. "I don't know whether that's a good idea. She hates me, sure, but I think what you and Ty Lee did at Boiling Rock was what finally made her snap. I'm afraid of what she might do to you."

"You said the security was tightened after she tried to attack you."

"I can't imagine how trapped she must feel. I know she's bound to keep her from bending. She is always surrounded by chi-blockers."

"Then Ty Lee and I will be fine. If anyone knows chi blocking, it's Ty Lee."

"There's something I haven't told you," Zuko said. "I got a messenger hawk from one of the healers at the hospital a few days ago."

"What is it?" Fear sliced Mai like a rain of tiny blades. "She's not -?"

"She's refusing meals. She's stopped fighting the guards and throwing tantrums. She's stopped trying to firebend. The healer said there's nothing they can do when a person's spirit dies."

"I have to see her. I'll tell Ty Lee I'll go with her tomorrow."

Zuko opened his arms and Mai laid her head on his chest. "It was Azula who brought us together, technically," she said.

"Be sure to thank her for that, if you aren't too busy dodging fireballs."

Ty Lee's beaming excitement dimmed as she and Mai climbed the white stone steps of the immaculate hospital. She was clutching a bouquet of handpicked flowers and a hamper of fresh fruit, but she had a bad feeling that Azula would take one look at the gifts and incinerate them. Mai bore no presents and walked straight backed at Ty Lee's side. She watched Ty Lee stumble under the weight of the food, her face shining, nervousness in her eyes. Mai wasn't afraid of what Azula would do to her; she was afraid of what the visit might do to Ty Lee.

"Remember what Zuko said," said Mai. "Azula is very sick."

"I know, I know! We're going to make her better. Today has a very positive energy."

Mai sighed.

A few white-robed healers bowed them in, and royal guards followed closely.

"We keep her on the third floor," said a woman with a tight gray bun.

"You keep her?" Ty Lee asked sharply.

"Yes, miss. Meaning no disrespect, but your friend is a very dangerous patient."

Ty Lee opened her mouth, but Mai said loudly, "We understand. Thank you, Sifu." The old woman pushed open the door.

The girl tied to the bamboo chair was not recognizable to anyone who had known Princess Azula of the Fire Nation. Her hair was shorn close to her scalp, and in places it looked as though it had been torn out in chunks. Red fingernail marks clawed all skin left visible by the simple brown cloth tunic she wore. Bones stood out against her skin as though they were trying to cut free of her body. She was more shadow than flesh.

One eyebrow arched when Ty Lee and Mai crossed the threshold, but Azula did not otherwise acknowledge their presence. She stared dully at the windowless wall, her eyes too big for their sockets, her face sunken.

Ty Lee rushed to her. A guard cried out in warning, and Ty Lee stopped and knelt on the floor at Azula's feet. She threw herself forward, prostrate as though the chair Azula was tied to were a throne. Azula did not even look at her, and Ty Lee's lip trembled.

Mai bowed mechanically, as though someone forced her back to curve, even though she knew no law could make her anymore. "Hello, Princess Azula," she said coldly.

Slowly, Azula turned to face Mai. "Ty Lee and Mai, the traitors. Have you come to cry at the princess's funeral? I'm afraid you're a few days too early."

"Azula!" Ty Lee cried. "Don't say things like that!"

"Oh don't whimper. Don't whinge, you hypocrite. You good as put me here, you good as killed me." Azula's voice was croaky as though it hadn't been used in days.

"But you're here to get better!"

"You say that as if you care. You made your choice, Ty Lee."

Ty Lee began to cry, and Azula spat at her in disgust.

"How dare you!" Mai seethed. Azula's eyes, the only free part of her corpse-like body, snapped towards her.

"Hello, Mai. How's Zuzu? Or should I say Fire Lord Zuzu?"

Mai ignored her, and Azula pressed on. "Better now that his burns are healing up? Better with nasty baby sister out of the way?"

"Azula - Zuko misses you. We all miss you!" Ty Lee said through her tears.

Her lip curling, Azula said, "I'd keep an eye on that brother of mine if I were you, Mai. With this little slut crawling around. I don't know whether his honor extends to being faithful to drab, boring girlfriends."

Mai stalked to Ty Lee's side, pulled her to her feet, and half-carried her out of the room. "Come on, Ty Lee, we're leaving."

"We'll have to see each other again, girls. So lovely of you to drop by."

Mai slammed the door behind her.

Azula found she didn't have the energy to turn her face away from the closed door. In her clouded mind, she watched Mai and Ty Lee leaving over and over again. Then she was back at Boiling Rock where first Mai, then Ty Lee, broke her heart.

She tried to focus, but an impossibly tall Ozai was flickering before her, looking down in disgust. He turned on his heel and left for the Earth Kingdom without her. Finally, her mothers' retreating back joined the parade of people who had left her forever. The last time Azula had seen her, she was saying good-by to Zuko.

Ursa hadn't come to say good-bye to Azula.

Her mother turned back into Mai and Ty Lee, and Azula felt salty tears sear the scratches she'd clawed down her cheeks. Outside, beautiful cherry blossoms she couldn't see scraped the walls of her hospital and prison.

The more I cry the sooner I'll die, Azula thought. The rhyme amused her, and she started to laugh before everything went black.


End file.
